ghost

February 26, 2004
8.33a

something i didn't expect was that getting over someone could be sad in itself. only ever having gotten over people at the end of relationships that ended for very good reasons, relationships that i left, this has been a first for me. and it's good to see it progressing. it's accomplishment and it's freedom and it's healthy. but also, like i told heather...it's part of me missing. i know i'm the same me but there's a bit of context missing and that makes me feel different and a little unsure. i told her, it's like i forgot to wear my ring or put my phone in my pocket. i go to touch it and it isn't there and i feel strangely naked.

i still whisper his name sometimes when i am alone, but it doesn't carry the same emotional force anymore.

maybe that's what i miss.