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another brick

August 01, 2004

"maybe we'll get wings.
maybe anything."

she stayed, she isn't going anywhere yet. we have this month and a half to solidify, to build, to warm. and so many great talks about everything soft and secret, i told her something i have never admitted to anybody, even myself. i can't write it here though, not yet. but it has to do with finding something i hate so much in others in myself, and figuring out how that affects me and affects people close to me. and i said it and i hated myself for a second but that went away soon enough.

and began conversations about these differences, these basic differences in our natures and our histories and our expectations, and how they can create these situations where one or the other ends up feeling hurt. and these things can be hard but somehow i think we can do it.

karen said she thinks that in relationships, whenever you come through a time of conflict and get to a resolution that is honest and good and makes both happy, it's like a golden brick. it's this very very special piece to add to the foundation and it's stronger and more beautiful than all the other bricks of happiness.

i like that thought.