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Places and Names

June 27, 2003
12:08 am

I hope
you go thru hell
tonight
beloved.
I hope
you choke to death
on lumps of stars
and by your bed a window
with frost
and moon on frost and
you want to scream
and can't
because
your woman is (I hope)
right there
asleep.

Baby I hope you never shut your eyes
so two of us
can pick up on
this dawn.

--Diane diPrima

so we skipped the show and went directly to the bar, no passing go and all that. it was good. i mean, it wasn't happy but it was real and good. he said "stop saying it's fine when it's not" and I said "okay then, it really sucks." and he said "forgive me?" sweetheart, i will forgive you anything if you just stay here with me a little longer.

his name is david. just like that, david. i don't want to hide behind the "him" anymore, when i talk about how real is all that matters. david is his name, like magic when i say it in my head (not think it but really say it, sometimes i think with lips moving like prayer).

so now we are back down to where it starts and what will it be this time around?