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The Sweetness Of the Leaving

May 31, 2003
11:59 pm

On my roof watching the street and feeling a little sad and removed from it all. Smoking, watching, waiting. Later, turned around and oh! Laughed out loud to see this beautiful sight right behind me all along and I hadn't noticed! Spiderwebs of light rising from city hall all lit up glowing red. Shifting and dancing and saying it's all okay now, it always was really.

How I wished him next to me then.

Singing this song over and over in my head, one I haven't even thought about in years:

a man is placed upon the steps, a baby cries
and high above you can hear the church bells start to ring
and the heaviness the heaviness of it settles in
and somewhere you can hear a mother sing

then it's one foot then the other
as you step out on the road
how much weight? how much weight?
then it's how long? and how far?
and how many times before it's too late?

calling all angels, calling all angels
walk me through this one
don't leave me alone
calling all angels, calling all angels
we're trying, we're hoping
and we're not sure how...

oh and every day you gaze upon the sunset
with such love and intensity
why it's almost as if
if you could only crack the code
you'd finally understand what this all means

but if you could...do you think you would
trade in all
all the pain and suffering?
ah, but then you would have missed
the beauty of the light upon this earth
and the sweetness of the leaving

calling all angels, calling all angels
walk me through this one
don't leave me alone
calling all angels, calling all angels
we're trying, we're hoping, we're hurting, we're loving
we're crying, we're calling
'cause we're not sure how this goes